Dear Love,
When I see old pictures of you, being genuinely happy, it makes my soul swell with delight. This is what I want for you, what I hope for you. Even though I'm not there, I see the pure, innocent joy in you and I want this for you more than anything.
Part of me wishes I can place you into that happy moment. Even if it were only for a few hours, I know at that exact moment in time, you were blessed with the peace and happiness God wants for His children in a permanent way. I feel I should step out of that moment in time and leave you with whatever or whomever was causing you joy so that you might go on feeling that way.
See, the thing is, I know you want the same for me, but the truth is you are what makes my soul dance with happiness. Even just me looking at you being happy is enough for me.
I don't know about you, but you will see some pictures of me in the past where I appear to be happy. Unless, they were from childhood, the feelings weren't genuine. Forced happiness. Do you know what I mean? You might even see one of me crying for joy, but in my heart of hearts, I know I was only crying for what I thought I finally accomplished. It wasn't real and was born out of sin. I know this now. I can only hope when I see you looking so incredibly happy, that these were genuine emotions. I feel I can tell the ones that are real because I see the purity and innocence in your eyes. I can see God's special child glowing through you. This is what I want for you, forever.
My love, if I think you could achieve this beautiful feeling without me, I will gladly step aside. I could spend forever just being an angel watching you be happy.
But I'm human and always will be. Even when I go on to my eternal home. You love me and want my happiness as much as I do yours. So it's only fair to let you know that my happiness is you.
Let me forever fulfill my role of making you happy, so I too, can be happy.
I know you are now happy. Let me see that smile,boo!
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