Sad To Sleep

 I have to say I'm sad to sleep
It makes me cry,it makes me weep

I never see your face in my dreams
It just won't happen, so it seems

I don't know why it happens this way
When your foremost in my thoughts throughout the day

It would mean so much and be very dear
But  I guess I'm not allowed to see the glory there

I guess I wouldn't mind, except it makes me so sad
I have to wait til morning to see your face and be glad

 Sad to say, I don't dream of you normally very much
When I do,I don't see your face, just feel your essence and such

So I cry before I go to sleep, because I'll really miss you so
I won't get to  think of you, and I love you more than you know

But I need my sleep because I'm tired and lonely every day
Maybe you'll be in my dreams tonight, to the  dear Lord I pray

Why, He Asked Me

"Why," he asked me
"Do you keep going back there again
To that old familiar place
That's a cause of all your pain

It started so long ago
When you set those roosters home to roost
You wanted to fit in and not be yourself
You wanted to give yourself an artificial boost

One thing lead to another
You lost a part of yourself
You sold out to the world
Put your soul up on a shelf

It got to where you couldn't escape
In the grace of God, He came to your rescue
Leading you back into His pasture
Using a method unique to only you

Then you wanna go and mess it up
Instead of turning to me, you held it within
Then gave it to your false friend to fix
You know there had to be discipline

Now we think you finally understand
Give up that fake friend and stop doing wrong
I don't want to lose our communion
Because even a day without you is too long

Come back to me and stay
Never again are you to leave
What we have is so much better
I love you, please believe."

 

Building Our Foundation

Finding
Our
Unique
Needs
Doing
All
To
Ignite
Our
Needs

 

האהוב היקר שלי

שלי יקר אהוב,
אני כותב לך את זה בדרך
בגלל שאני כל כך הרבה מאוהב בך
אני רוצה לצעוק את זה לעולם
אבל אנחנו חייבים לשמור על האהבה שלנו בסוד
כמו טאבו נסתר
אף אחד לא היה מבין
אבל אם אני לא אומר כלום
אני מרגיש כאילו אני אתפוצץ
איך אני מייחל ליום שבו אני יכול ללכת אליך
ואוהב אותך באופן אישי
לפני כולם
אני אוהב אותך ישי מיכאל
כל רגע אני מבלה איתך ברוח
האם הדבר הכי היפה שאני מכיר
אבל אני יודע שמים הוא עוד יותר יפה
מכיוון שאתה שם
כל נשימה שאני לוקח כשאני רחוק ממך
האם כמו סכין כואב של צער
אבל כל נשימה שאני לוקח
האם צעד אחד קרוב יותר אליך
אני אוהב אותך
בכבוד רב,
נעמי

Brownie

Brownie
My sweet brownie
Made a lovely shade of cocoa
Lightened by time
But always as sweet
Handsome face
Brilliant mind
Filled with wonder and talent
Half a century is what you got
What once was a shining star
Sunk to the depths
It had to be that way
Something wrong can never last
The beautiful soul didn't belong to the world
Contrary to what it might seem
My sweet brownie
You were meant to be sanctified and set apart
You had to go home
Where you belong
Where the shining is real
Where it's neverending
Too good for the world, precious heart
He took you back, He needed you more
He saw you were in too deep and rescued you
In His mercy He knew you needed your rest
To come back to what He made you to be
Now you stand in His glory, forgiven and loved
You'll shine brighter than you ever could've here
You deserve it my sweet brownie. 
I wouldn't have it any other way
I'll meet up with you one day...

 

Until The Time Comes

My body is tired
Full of aches and pain
Been through the storms
Weathered the rain

But my spirit inside
Has energy like a child
If only my body
Would let it run wild

If the needs of my soul
And my heart's desire
Could come to fruition
What joy it would sire

I'd give all that love
And passion to you
I'd be the icing on the cake
In everything you'd do

I'd make your life rich
I'd make your life whole
I'd do all that I could
To fulfill your soul

Until the time comes
I can be there in ALL ways
I'll do the best that I can now
To add happiness to your days

 

Dear God

Dear God,

Thank you so much for letting me love the cutest boy ever. I won't stop loving him even at the end of never.

If making him happy and to smile is the purpose of my existence, I gladly submit with absolutely no resistance.

Giving him love, I feel Your complete glory and joy. He makes my soul sing-that beautiful boy.

Because of the love, I see beyond any earthly desires and needs. We knew our treasure would be found in planting our seeds.

In Your Omniscient way You brought us together. A love you foresaw that would last forever.

Would have messed up if we gave ourselves or had been given. Only your anointed matching is truly livin'.

Thank you, God. He's more than I could ever have hoped for. Can't wait to be with him and love him some more.

Raging Storm

My soul is screaming
Screaming in tortuous pain
Like a raging storm
Here it comes again

My soul screams out loud
But inside of me 
Falls on human deaf ears
The way it has to be

It's more than a longing
It's eternal aching
For what I need most
Feeling forsaken

You went away, taking most of my soul
Leaving a mere essence behind
It had to have been known
I would lose my mind

I know I had to be left broken
In order for me to be fixed right
I've been transformed into a proper spirit
My body and remaining soul cries day and night

The old me would've been gone by now
That person I was before
My spirit just won't let me
My love multiplying forevermore

It's all so very hard for me
Sometimes I wish I were dead
But when I promised to wait, no matter the pain
I meant every word I said...

24/7

I want to be with you 24/7
4/30/12/365
This is the truth
It ain't no jive

You keep telling me
The trip will happen soon
You don't like to see me crying
From midnight until noon

The closer it comes
I just want it more badly
There's nothing else I want
I'll follow you gladly

You say eveything's almost ready
You're mostly just waiting for me
You say I'm a big part of the picture
When I arrive how complete the picture will be

I guess I won't stop crying
Til I'm with you 24/7
When that glorious time comes to be
I'll know that I'm in Heaven

 

The Sentence

Going on 6 years
Of my undetermined sentence
Maybe it's just a part
Of my overall repentance

I feel like I'm in prison
In heart,soul and mind
In solitary confinement
The loneliness, not kind

I love you more and more
As each day slowly goes by
But, hey, maybe that's the point
Maybe that's the reason why

I water this garden of love
Each day with my own tears
Maybe the harvest will be abundant
After all these years

If my love and devotion
Has reached up to you and risen
All this pain will be worthwhile
When I'm released from this here prison

Just Tell Me

What is it that you need
I'm here at your command
What is it that you want
I'm here to lend a hand

I don't want to sit here
Just collecting dust
Please go ahead and use me
Before I start to rust

Now that I know my purpose
I'm anxious to service you
Please don't leave me in suspense
Just tell me what to do

I was made just for you
To be the helper by your side
I don't care who knows it
I've got nothing left to hide

I know we're in different locations
And that is so hard for me
But I'll do my darndest to be there for you
And be the best woman for you that I can be

Our Gift

I wish that we
Could give God a present
Something very nice
Something so pleasant

What could we give
To the Creator of it all
Something so precious
Whether big or small

There's not a thing we can give Him
That He doesn't already own
We can give Him love and loyalty
The same that to us He has shown

Forever and ever, God
In all that we do
We'll give you the glory
Because we love you!

No One Would Believe

If they could only see
What you've done for me

If they could just know
How far you had to go

If they just knew
All that you do

But no one would believe
They would never conceive

But God knows what you did
It was planned before I was a kid

Paralleled in  a much  smaller extent
Only when it was revealed I knew what it meant

We had to both hit bottom dirt
We had to both really hurt

The only way for us to gain
Was for us to experience pain

Then you left
My soul felt cleft

But only for a matter of days
Then it's when you began to amaze

You found me
You ground me

You put me back
Gave me what I lacked

Like the light of day
You showed me the way

Gave me unconditional love
With your gift from above

You didn't want me to keep making mistakes
You wanted better for me for both our sakes

You shepherded me back into His fold
I wish this story could be told

But no one would believe
They would never conceive....

Thank you for loving me

That's What He Said

I come to you worrying and crying
Wondering what it's going to be like
But you're not worried at all
Just care free ol Mike

Sitting here freaking out 
About things I don't understand
Trying to wrap my head around stuff
Come on, gimme a hand

I sense that smile
Upon your face
You can't tell the secret
Til the end of the race

I beg and plead
I scream and cry
You say "Why you trippin'
Why, oh why?

You've been assured
That everything will be fine
One day the light
On the truth will shine

I know how you feel
Remember, I've been there
Filled with questions
Worry and fear

Now I'm on the other side
And I see things so clear
One day you'll have that
My sweet,dear

I won't spoil the surprise 
It will be ever so grand
Have faith in God and me
I'll never let go your hand

Now please stop that crying
I hate seeing you sad
Let's just have fun together
And in each moment be glad."

 

Thank You, Thank You!

Thank you so much
For being so kind
Loving me always
Though at times I was blind

You might think it's odd 
I react the way I do
When you answer my prayer
With a force right on cue

I break down in tears
Because sometimes I feel undeserving
Like I'm not good enough
But your love is unswerving

I pray to learn to graciously accept
The answers and blessing you send to me
To you, my Heavenly Father
All the glory to Thee 

          

Looking Back

I just went back there
I took a little peek
Who knows what I was looking for
What I'd hope to seek

I have changed so much
Since the last time I'd been there
I see that I don't belong
That much is pretty clear

Old familiar names
Is something that I see
They have yet to move on
It's the opposite of me

I see that what they are
Is stuck in the past
My eyes are on forever
Something that will last

I don't know Why
But I went there on a lark
Now I see the truth
It's dishonest and it's dark

Then I asked myself a question
Would Jesus be hanging out here
The answer is  loudly "No"
He'd say "You get out of there!"

The truth wouldn't want you wallowing
In someone's attention-getting game
You think you're part of something big
When you are not, such a shame!

(To be continued...)

Running Away

I'm not running away from you
Tho that's the way it sometimes seems
Sometimes the scared little girl inside
Appears to leave when her fear deems

I'm not scared of you
I really love you so much
Sometimes it's so overwhelming
A huge adrenaline rush

I want so much to be near you
You do everything that you should
You're everything I've ever dreamed of
Sometimes I think you're too good

I've been told you feel the same for me
By a source higher than no other
If I just let my inhibitions free
We could be with one another

I'll stop my running away
This is my promise to you
I'll devote myself to giving you love
In everything I do

Tee Hee Hee

You always make me
Tee hee hee
Whenever I look
And it's you I see

I get the giggles
I get to blushing
I get the butterflies
My face is flushing

I get to feeling
Like some silly girl
I can't help it
You rock my world

What's it about you
That makes me tee hee hee
 Don't care what it is
You make me so happy

Love Is Never Far

So many days do I feel
So sad and all alone
But I've got the love of Father, Son, Holy Spirit
And you as I've been shown

Begging for scraps of love
Is something I will do no more
With the love I know I've got
I needn't settle any more

You are all my family
Guess you've always been
As far as I can see
I guess I  kinda win

That's why I store my treasures in Heaven
Because that is where you  are
I call for you when I get lonely
Because your love is never far

Perfect Love

Perfect love 
Not proven by works
Perfect love
Inside you lurks

Your good works
Are a manifestation
Of showing your love
In an act of celebration

A perfect love
Needn't show off
The recipient will know
With natural feelings so soft

Perfect love
Comes naturally
It isn't forced
It's a destiny

Perfect love
Drives  out fear
That is why
I hold you dear

What I have for you
Is perfect love
Though we're far apart
It's your gift from above

Vacation

Who needs a  fancy vacation
To visit Hollywood and Vine
When my vacation will surely be
The day you're mine, all mine

Who needs the Bahamas
Or two weeks at a Hawaiian beach
When I know my excursion to you
Is almost within my reach

Who needs the Eiffel Tower
Or anywhere else in France
When the day is coming soon
We'll consummate our romance

Who needs to ski in the Alps
To me that seems no fun
I know my source of happiness
And you, sir, are the one

All my days will be vacations
When I get to spend them all with you
I'm all packed and ready to go
Just tell me what to do

 

Upon Reflection

When I look back, upon reflection
To the best of my recollection
I secretly held you in my affection

No one saw my hidden side
In no one at all, I chose to confide
My love for you that I chose to hide

Afraid of the reaction
I chose to display no action
Forgive me for my stupid infraction

Although, it wouldn't have given us a chance
To embark on a beautiful romance
Or maybe a once in a lifetime dance

Never again shall I shy away
From telling you I love you everyday
And constantly for you I pray

For now I am much more clever
To know that eternity is forever
I claim my love til the end of never

What I See

Looking through some of your old pictures
I really feel that it's my rightly duty
To tell you  I identify you as one of God's creations
Because all I can see is an exquisite beauty

When others look or think of you
They don't think or see things the way I do
Blinded extremes of love or hate they have
I cut to the chase and see the real you

I know you are beautiful
Because you carry the fruits of God's Spirit
Doesn't matter how others perceive you
He's crazy in love with you from the way I hear it

None of us are perfect
While on earth we've all had sin
But because you accepted the sacrifice of Jesus' death
He looks past all that and sees your heart from within

I know that you are with Him now
He displays you as a treasure in His hand
The day I come to join you there
Will be a perfect day, so grand!

Lovely Day

I wish I could spend
This lovely day with you
We'd just do
Whatever you wanted to

You're here in spirit
And that's O.K
But how I yearn
For that joyous day

The day when this seperation
Is just a thing of the past
The day when our togethrness
Is something that will last

Sun is shining
Birds are singing
And hark! Do I hear
The ice cream truck bell ringing?

It's such a lovely day
But it's empty without you
I pray for the day to get caught up
Then never again will I be blue

 

Thank you

Thank you for
Making that sacrifice for me
Giving that advice to me
Just being nice to me

Thank you for 
Hearing
Sharing
And caring

Thank you for 
Giving
Living
And forgiving

Thank you for 
Knowing
Showing
And growing

You'll receive my love 100 fold
As I'm forever in your debt
Since the very first time we met
Good loving forever is what you'll get

Never Gonna Give You Up

Never gonna give you up
Not for all the tea in China
Because lovin' you, sir
Nothin' could be finer

Never gonna give you up
Not for gold, pure and fine
Nothing can compare to you
And I'm proud to say you're mine

Never gonna give you up
Your love makes my world go round
I believe I'll just love you forever
Do you like the way that sounds?

For Real

Some say I'm obsessed
But really I'm possessed
By your love. I am blessed
It's better than the rest
I have to get it of my chest
You just fill me with zest
Because you are the best

Here comes the time, I guess
To publicly confess
No matter the mess
Serious like chess
You deserve no less
My love for you,I hereby profess

 

Love Vomit

Just one look at you
Words flow out like love vomit
Vomit in a good way
As fast as a comet

What you doin' to me, boy
You got me wrapped around your finger
 You make the rhymes come out
Like I'm a rap singer

I'm stupid for you
I act kinda crazy
When the love vomit comes
It ain't lazy

When the love vomit flows
I just can't seem to stop
If I don't express it
My heart will just pop

Bring it on baby
This love vomit is O.K
With this kind of lovin'
I can vomit all  day

I Wish

I sometimes do wish
I had more than your picture to kiss
The touch of the physical
Is something I miss

To look in your eyes
I lovingly long
To hear you whisper
To me your song

If I could taste
Your sweet cocoa flesh
If I could see 
Our bodies mesh

To smell your smell
When holding you tight
I know that I'd feel
Oh, so right

Instead we're taking the time
To work on mind, spirit and soul
So when we come together
Our love will be whole

Still a girl can dream
About being with her man
But she must hold on a bit longer
It will happen when it can

 

It Was You

You are all
That they are not
In all your actions
Deeds and thoughts

They all hurt me
With love that was selfish
Then you came along
Better than I could wish

They all hurt me
With conditional love
But yours was different
Sent from up above

I hold no grudges
And I wish them no ill
Because the truth of it all
Is they weren't part of God's will

When I did what was right
The difference was clear
You showed me real love
It was like a breath of fresh air

I wish I could articulate
The depths of how I love you so
But the way we are with one another
I think you already know